So about five months ago I had to make the hardest decision I’ve ever had to make, I had to choose between starting a new life 200 miles away from where I live now or staying with no money and no-where to live but I get to have all my friends and job, I decided to stay and moved in with one of my best friends.
For the first few months it was amazing and I would just go out all the time, I love the freedom and feeling that my life was finally 100% mine.
The past month has been hell for me, I’ve been feeling so homesick, I miss my step mum and younger sister like crazy (I pretty much brought my sister up so my parents could work).
I decided to deal with this feeling by going out even more, getting more and more drunk every time and making a fool out of myself.
Now it seems like my friends don’t want to spend time with me, I’ve not been out drinking for 2 weeks, but yesterday I found out my step mum doesn’t want me to visit over the holidays as everyone is really busy with work.
Now I feel so incredibly down and my friends are no where to be seen as they spend most nights out drinking.
I hate the fact I have to spend Christmas alone, I hate it even more I just want someone I care about to be there for me, like I have for them so many times.
I’m thinking I made the wrong choice when I decided to stay, would I have been happier with my family? I don’t even know anymore.
Friday, 19 December 2008
..Choices..
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2 comments:
There are too many What Ifs in this world to think about. You have made the decision now, just try to make the best of a bad situation. I know its easy for me to say but my point is there is no point wasting time regretting when you have the freedom to do anything you want.
Mate, I had a similar decision to make once upon a time, I moved away. My friends I had back then, I rarely speak to, in fact I only speak to one of them and thats usually just a quick phone call for birthdays etc. I don't regret my decision to move away, I had a lot of fun, met a heap of crazy new people, did a hell of a lot of drinking but now, I dunno. Tomorrow I leave where I live, move 200km to a town where I know nobody, start a new job all that bullshit. Christmas is just another day in the end mate. Just have a quiet glass of wine and remember all the good times. If it's your first chrissy away from home of course its gonna be hard, but it gets better.
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